Those in society who in good faith attempt to be monogamous may eventually come to the realization they aren't capable of it and wonder if they are flawed. There are variations on these queries also from the perspective of those who are currently in monogamous relationships who experience their partners or their own breach of "the agreement."
It's much more than an agreement. When someone you trust blindsides you it is as if you've lost your floor. Life requires networks and collaborations. When a connection comes loose, the whole thing can unravel or the tear in the net causes loss of some kind of loss in the lives of the person and their various social and even career networks.
Life on Earth is carried out while inside a human body. I will state clearly all must still refer to the fundamental idea written in my book "The Pattern of Secrets.",
"Desire and everyday life do not ride the same rails." - Eve Featherstone
Those who realize monogamy may not be possible and maybe isn't "the best way" anyway, are free thinkers and hopefully do not yet have children. They are valuable on the family tree because they are evolving towards something away from the self fulfilling goal of having a family and providing for their needs. What is it they are evolving towards? No one knows. It is the edge to watch for surprises and new truths. No one should blunt the live edges of these creators. They will do, experience, fold in information and do again. As the universe's "new code" they are knitting new realities for humans.
No matter how much of a free thinker you are, if your desire train crosses your everyday train tracks, there will be some kind of train wreck eventually. If you can keep them separate, all will be well, but that is so rarely the case. Don't be a fool and assume you can mastermind either train sharing a track with the other.
By "everyday life," I mean work, intellect, constancy, foundation, well being and realization of real goals and aspirations.
Partners in everyday life (including parents, siblings, children, co-workers) ought not to cross the tracks of your desire train.
These two tracks have different destinations and their own itinerary of stops. The schedules do not follow the same time zone or mental geography. The mental geography of each is foreign territory to the other.
If the tracks cross there will be people hurt; people you love. You will be hurt too.
Do as you will (because you have no choice if you want to be authentic) but do not let the tracks cross.
It is not a matter of monogamy, it is a matter of Desire (body) vs. Everyday Life. Respect the sovereignty of each and let them take their own separate trips.
-Eve Featherstone
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